I’m hoping I’ll have a lighter load next week. My three-day weekend is proving to be necessary just to keep up with the plates assigned to us, and I don’t even have any GEs to worry about yet! I miss all of you guyyyss. Anyway, here’s a short list of things I have learned over the course of last week:
I am fluent enough in conversational Tagalog to survive without being ridiculed.
Saying I’m from CSB still gets me funny looks, but the peeps are a lot richer and less hardcore than I would have preferred.
The Smoking Ban is non-existent. Long live vendors who sell cigarettes under-the-table!
Taking the Katipunan jeep to Palma Hall > taking the Ikot to Palma Hall. I am an idiot when it comes to these things, but at least I’m learning.
Some jeeps from Katipunan that say they’re going to UP may not actually go through UP, leaving confused freshmen walking to SC late in the evening.
P10 worth of fishballs is a lot.
Apparently, having boys flirt with you is not a 100% win situation. EW EW EW EW EW.
The one phrase that kept rigning through my mind the whole time: ‘D’awwwwwwwww, our widdle Jamie is growing uuuuuuup. 8’D’ To which, I’m fairly certain, I would get punched in the face for saying.
(Sung exactly to the tune and rhythm of “Billie Jean.”)
He was more like a beauty queen pitchin’ OxiClean I said don’t mind, but what do you mean, “It’s two-for-one If you hurry up and order now” He said “Use Zorbeez, to wipe the floors in the round”
He told me his name was Billy Mays, as he yelled in my face Then every head turned with eyes that dreamed of two-for-one If they hurried up and ordered now
People always told me be careful what you buy And don’t go spilling stuff on carpets, boy And mother always told me be careful who you love And be careful what you do, Vince, the beard knows the truth
Billy Mays is not my lover He’s just a pitchman who claims Zorbeez is the one And he’ll give you two for one He says, yes, big or small, Zorbeez gets it all
For forty days and for forty nights He pitched Instant Shine ‘Cuz who can stand when their car looks bad So put it in your hand And you’ll find there is no wax residue So take my strong advice, just remember to always buy two (Please buy two)
He told me, “Baby, with Orange Glo, you’ll be good to go” Then showed a “before” photo to me, the tub was a mess (oh, no!) Then Orange Glo took the stains right away
People always told me be careful what you buy And don’t let your tub go uncleaned He came and stood right by me, with the smell of citrus fruit This happened much too soon There was shipping and handling too
Billy Mays is not my lover He’s just a pitchman who claims OxiClean’s the one And he’ll give you two for one
Billy Mays is not my lover He’s just a pitchman who claims Orange Glo’s the one And he’ll give you two for one He says, “But that’s not all, it’ll polish your wood too”
He says “It’s not two-for-one — I’ll make it four-for-one”
Billy Mays is not my lover He’s just a pitchman who sells me Samurai Sharks Now my knives are never dull And if you buy quickly, the second Shark is free
He says “It’s not four-for-one — I’ll make it six-for-one” He says it’s six-for-one
Billy Mays is not my lover Billy Mays is not my lover Billy Mays is not my lover Billy Mays is not my lover Billy Mays is not my lover
“The whole foundation of Christianity is based on the idea that intellectualism is the work of the Devil. Remember the apple on the tree? Okay, it was the Tree of Knowledge. “You eat this apple, you’re going to be as smart as God. We can’t have that.”—Frank Zappa (via thinkfree) (via friendlyatheist) (via brigno)